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#DearLord Hi! I have a few questions to you about how some stuff works. Say for example #GuardianAngels
#DearLord Do we get one throughout our life or do they ever get switched around?
Also, #DearLord do they ever think we are a pain? Our #GuardianAngels? Do they ever go, “not her again! She’s always getting herself in danger!” Or maybe, “see I told you she was funny. She had me cracking up all last month while I was on her rotation!” #DearLord I think the latter would apply more to me.
#DearLord, I know what you are gonna say. You’ll say, “I see I blessed you with the gift of curiosity. But discussions at staff meetings are confidential :-)” right?
#DearLord You do agree with @StellaNganga that #GuardianAngels are scary, no? Then why do they enter people’s houses and say “Do not be afraid”? Every time! It baffles me why she wants to see one while she’s alive. #DearLord, I’m not sure I wanna see one, they might scare the shit out of me!
#DearLord all I’m saying is that I hope the #GuardianAngel PR team has rebranded. Some of them are known for striking people deaf, blind, dead and giving people nasty looks. Maybe start some sort of #GuardianAngels CSR or ask me anything (AMA) sessions?
That being said #DearLord, it is uber cool that we each have a bodyguard. (Wait! Do #GuardianAngels talk into their sleeves? Do they have sleeves?) Thank you for caring for us in this manner. I love you. You rock :-*
For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways. They shall bear thee up in their hands, lest thou dash thy foot against a stone. Ps 91: 11-12
21st June 2014
© 2014 Mugethi Gitau
sometimes when I spend time with you
i get really sad
coz I connect with you
even my will desires
to submit to you
you get me
and I get you
it’s a soulical connection
you are my soulmate
shoot me now.
you are my soulmate
I wish you
had found me
29th Sep 2013
The Jewish people have a custom known as Sitting Shiva. It’s when someone dies and you stay indoors even after they are buried. You mourn the deceased. You talk of their memories. Your neighbors and family bring you food and tell you they are sorry. And they sit Shiva with you for a while. Then they go, and someone else comes.
At the end of sitting Shiva, you have mourned the person all you possibly could. Plus you have cabin fever. And cannot wait to leave the house and resume life.
I feel like that’s what I’m doing. Sitting Shiva for an ended relationship. Mourning the death of a dream. Of hopes and aspirations. Which just like with death, is through no fault of mine. Going through the stages of grief. Shock. Denial. Anger. Negotiation. Acceptance.
My friends sit Shiva with me although it’s not their loss. While I have some wonderful memories, that now seem foolish as they could ALL have been based on lies, my friends now feel free to say just how much they hated the guy. How they mistrusted him from the start, but kept mum to keep peace. How better now than later. And how I’m obviously better off without that prick. (Their words, not mine.)
They also have funny stories that make me laugh through my tears.
But all through, I sit in pain. Unbelievable, heart wrenching pain. It never seems to go away. Even when I get reprieve it hovers, waiting to come back and occupy my heart.
Unlike mourning for the dead which has a proscribed number of days, I don’t know when I will be finished Sitting Shiva. But deep down, waaay deep I might add, I know I will. And I can’t wait for that moment, where I will be so weary of mourning, I will get up without a word to anyone. Jump into the shower. Make myself all pretty again. And go out to resume life.
Wounded, scarred, yet unbowed.
I hope it will be soon.
Tue, 6th August 2013
#DearLord How are you? I hope the task of managing all of us is not driving you crazy.
#DearLord I keep asking you for a sign. I suspect you keep sending me signs but I keep ignoring them.
#DearLord I hear Your voice. *whispers* Is my voice louder than yours? Why am I so conflicted?
#DearLord How about a really clear sign? Like a note, signed by you? Or even a tweet?
#DearLord Am all for listening to my Spirit. But what if my Spirit says one thing today and another tomorrow? In that case did my Spirit change it’s mind? Why?
#DearLord I’m all for growth and stuff, but would you ensure that I DON’T lose my mind in the process?
#DearLord I hate being wrong. It’s not my fault, You made me like this.
#DearLord If you move me past one thing, you are taking me towards something better, right? Even if I can’t see it?
#DearLord Thank you. I love you. You rock! :-*
“The Lord moves, the earth is shaken”
So I finally went ahead and decided to tweet God these questions that I’ve been longing to ask. – at the risk of not being considered a good Christian 😉
As per the suggestion of one my followers, let’s call these the
#DearGod how are you?
#DearGod Allow me 1/365 1/4 days to go “Why Lord Why?”
#DearGod Had you made me a good liar, my life would be way easier. #WhyLordwhy, am I so sincere? I thought I was abnormal till the other day!
#DearGod Why do I still trust people? Haven’t all the events showing me NOT to, been to make me learn that? Lord, I don’t think age will cure this condition.
#DearGod some people I know just keep doing nasty things to people Day in and Day out. They never seem to get punished, but people who try to do good (this includes me Lord) they seem to get hurt alot #WhyLordWhy?
#DearGod and why is it every time I try to do something bad I get busted? Others been doing it forever, not a single bust! #WhyLordWhy?
#DearGod why did you make me so impatient? Was that not supposed to correct itself automatically when I went to church or read the bible?
#DearGod now that we’re talking, am really hoping you’re OK with short prayers. Some people say “I went deep into prayer” that confuses me. I mean I have never woken up at 3 and prayed till dawn. Some people swear by that formula. Should I be doing that?
#DearGod would you do me a favor and mark out the nasty men with a pair of horns and a tail? Maybe make them carry a pitchfork for good measure?
#DearGod sometimes I say curse words – when it seems like no other word could express what I feel. Do you mind? What if I do it in church?
#DearGod kicking, pinching, hitting and punching is allowed once in a while, right? How often?
🙂 #DearGod thanks for this great convo we just had. You’re the only one who can hear me when I don’t actually say anything. #Love
#DearGod am really sorry for the times I didn’t hear you when you were speaking to me. Am sorry too for all the times when I’ve tried to assist you in doing your job. I’m I’ll try my best not to assist you again. Lol!
#DearGod Thanks for listening to me. Shall we do this again in a year’s time? During which time I’ll try not to ask #WhyLordWhy?
#DearGod Do have a wonderful night.
Love always, your beloved Miss Mugethi. xoxo